Thursday, July 11, 2013

Sometimes it is good to Forget, by Yolanda Adele

 Here is a different perspective on memory from Yolanda.

I have come to the conclusion that a great memory is a bit over-rated. When I was much younger I had extraordinary recall. My mind never seemed to run out of inventory. I remembered every unkind word, broken promise, betrayed confidence, my failures, others failures.
Being overly sentimental is like a web that can entangle and choke a person with memories, whether they are good, sad, or ugly. Memories can be disruptive; they come back when you don’t want them, in daydreams, nightmares or flashbacks, usually accompanied by painful emotions.
In this age of pharmaceutical wonders there are pills for anxiety; depression, improved memory, libido; the morning after pill; why not have pills for forgetting? Sure, one could argue that our memories are part of what makes us who we are. Yet, if we didn’t recall the negativisms with which some of us grew up, the naysayers, we’d have greater confidence and potential to be the best we can be.
Still I’m reminded that life, like art, has light and shadow. Mosaics illustrate wholeness with intricate complex, interrelated elements of parts, or factors. In essence, I’m a piece of unfinished work, and in the end, discernment is the key.
I must be poised to remember that sometimes it is good to forget.


  1. From Charlotte:

    Words of wisdom!

  2. From Karen -

    Yolanda I just read this. Your writings are exceptional. This one is so profound and so true. You are very deep and with much talent. I think as we get older, we feel the sadness and pain because time isn't in our favor, and some things will never get right or be humorous when there is no "long -run" to put it in perspective. I think you are a marvelous lady, and I have good taste! Good work, friend…abrazos….Karen

  3. From Peggy:
    Dear Yolanda, Yes, I agree. I think discernment is the key, deciding what and which to forget so more of the positive stuff can inhabit our minds, but I also want to remember some of the shady stuff, otherwise how can I tell what is bright if there is nothing to with which to compare it ? I feel I must remember to forget the hurts and disruptions, but only to the point of whether or not they really are disturbing my life. Those memories which help, whether we call them "good" or "bad" have to be allowed, otherwise the space becomes vacuous and we end up with demented and vacuous minds. With love from Peggy

  4. You always have such a thoughtful perspective. People have so much to learn from you.