E is for “Enlighten,” By Janet Utermohlen

 

I know that “E” is out of our alphabetical order, but I have reason to post this particular story by Janet. Janet was part of a memoir-writing group that I facilitated for about six years in La Mirada. Sadly, that class was cut several years ago when the California budget crunch forced Cerritos to cut a number of classes (a situation Janet dreaded). I learned yesterday that Janet had passed away last month. I was, of course, saddened to hear that news.

            There was, however, some encouragement tucked into the delivery of that sad news. It turns out that Janet spent her last days in the care of a Korean woman – a woman with many stories to tell. During their days together the caregiver shared her stories with Janet, telling her about triumphs and tragedies in her own life. She knew that her stories were important, but never thought about writing them down. Janet persuaded her to take time to put her stories on paper. She has now begun that project, “enlightened” by Janet’s example.  ~ Bonnie

        I am 85 years old and in good health. By living this long, I have many stories to tell, but I really did not know how to get them down on paper. By attending this class, “Memoir Writing for Older Adults,” I have learned simple ideas to enlighten my memories, and I have written four essays brought about by what I have learned. This has given me great pleasure.

        By coming to class and fulfilling the assignments, I have become centered, and I can start and continue writing my memories. I have felt very enlightened by this class, and have enjoyed listening and learning from all the members who attend.

        I would be devastated if it were to be discontinued.

        The letter I was assigned is the letter “E.” The word I picked to use in this essay is “enlightened,” so I feel this class has enlightened my mind and gives me, Janet Utermohlen, a purpose in life, which I have been unable to perform until now.

M is for our “Memoir Group,” By Yolanda Adele

When I walk into our memoir group on Thursday afternoons I often feel as if I have “come home.” This sense of belonging together, regardless of our differences, is part of what frees us to create our best work. Thank you, Yolanda, for expressing our hearts in your words. ~ Bonnie

Our memoir group is a treasure. I once read that there are families that we are born into, and there are families that are formed in the heart. The latter is what many find in our memoir group. Through sharing our stories, we have formed friendships that are based on trust and acceptance. There are few places in this fast-paced millennium where people can come together to be listened to with willing minds and hearts. We are able to do this because in the process of writing about our life experiences, we have learned to understand ourselves and others in the group. That understanding shows us how we are all connected by our humanness, regardless of our background, economic status, or religious affiliation.

Our group’s leader, Bonnie Mansell, is a profoundly caring, insightful teacher. Bonnie teaches her students that they can have a trove of personal, historical legacy to share what may be otherwise lost.

Our memoir group is a treasure for those who know the true wealth stored up in life stories.

L is for “Love,” By Margaret Takacs

Although this story has already been posted, I want to repeat it this week in its alphabetical sequence. I posted the story on May 9, shortly after Margaret ended her journey in this life. Once again, I am humbled to have had such a friend. I hope that those who read Margaret's story will have an inkling of what a special person she was. Her life was so much harder than most, yet she approached each day with an attitude of gratitude, modeling her values through her actions, as well as her words. I am blessed to have known her.  ~ Bonnie 

“L” is the beginning letter of the most powerful world of our dictionary. It covers a multitude of emotions, which can trigger a multitude of events from history and from individual lives.

“Love is a Many Splendored Thing;” so says a lovely old song I have heard my daughter Kathy sing so many times. It can take many forms: love of family, friends, cherished pets, plants, favorite possessions, and foods – all the colorful mosaics of our lives. It surely has taken me to the pinnacle of happiness and to the depth of despair in my lifetime. Throughout the years, as my daughters heard (maybe too often) the stories of my life, they always encouraged me to put those stories down on paper. I don’t know what held me back: maybe procrastination, laziness or reluctance, not knowing how to reveal the tumult of my life.

Then in my retirement, when my physical disabilities started to affect the vitality of my life, came an unexpected pleasure I greatly value and enjoy today. Before that, one of my daughters, Judith, gave me a book to read and record the important events of my life. It touched my cord of resistance, and I thought it would be a lot easier this way. And then my other daughter, Kathleen, met by chance with Bonnie Mansell, and she sort of enlisted me in Bonnie’s memoir writing class, leaving me no more excuses.

Joining Bonnie’s memory writing class brought many pleasures into my life. Her sunny-spirited guidance overrides my occasional glum and my resistance to writing. We have a wonderful company of classmates who become friends while sharing each others stories ~ sometimes with tears of sorrow, sometimes with joy, sometimes with great humor and laughter. We value and enjoy the stories of each other’s lives.

In my writing class I find companionship sharing each other’s joys or sorrows or burdens, and in the process we rediscover that love is a many splendored thing, which can teach even my ninety-year-old heart to sing. Yes, love is truly a “many splendored thing.”

K is for Kindness, by Shirley Mark

It is especially poignant to read stories from our classmates who can no longer share our Thursday afternoons with us. This piece is a reminder of a very special friend. Shirly was one of my very first students when I began teaching memoirs in Downey. She stayed with me when the Downey class was closed and participated in our Norwalk group for many years. Although she can no longer be with us in class, we remember her with love and gratitude. ~ Bonnie

Kindness – the quality or state of being kind; good will; graciousness; kindhearted.

        All of the above reflect the kindness I have felt in the Downey writing class and in this one in Norwalk. How fortunate I was – how fortunate I am.

        Last week I went into my son’s old room, which is now used for anything and everything, looking for a photo. Going through papers, scrap book pages, etc., I found a letter from a Downey student expressing how much she enjoyed hearing about my travels. Next to it was a photo of the class which had been given to me, “in friendship.”

That was and is typical of the kindness that begins with the instructor and filters through the excellent and kind students. Am I lucky to be a part of the warmth, friendliness and kindness of that class? You bet!!!

J is for “Jotting my Journey with Joy,” By Evelyn Watson

Isn't it funny how so many of us have a "secret" desire to write? It takes courage to give expression to that desire, but it brings so much reward. Are you letting fear keep you from taking the chance of putting your ideas down on paper? Take encouragement from Evelyn. ~ Bonnie

 

          I have always had a secret desire to write about my life. I doubt, though, I would ever have attempted doing so without the invitation of a friend to attend the Norwalk Senior Center memoirs class. Ironically, my friend who had persisted in getting me to come to class, stopped attending soon after I began.

        What a joy within my heart to actually be writing and to have the help, inspiration, ideals and encouragement I needed for jotting my journey by attending this class. What a joy to find compatibility among so many who are so diverse in their talents, ideals, and beliefs. Along with jotting my journey stories I’ve have the added bonus of getting acquainted and making friendships beyond time spent in class.

        Some class members are real journalists, while some jargonize their stories. Some are jiffy writers, having stories each week, while others spend time contemplating what they will write next. Some write about their jaunts, others about their jobs. Some write jingles, and some are jovial writers, but all write because they enjoy doing so.

        Every story reveals some part of who we are, and jogs memories from each of our memory banks to jot down for future stories. It takes courage to share some of our stories, exposing ourselves. Yet the acceptance among us helps us deal with issues we want or need to express. We voice our feelings and share our concerns as we join together in common bonds through our stories. We are companions for each other in writing our stories. For me, this is an important fulfillment.

        How thankful I am that my friend recognized in me the longing to write even though it wasn’t something she desired for herself. Just maybe she came upon this group because I was the one who was supposed to be here. And so the years spent attending this class have also become part of my life’s journey story. Could I not find joy in this class jotting my journey? And what a joy it is!

I is for Inspiration, by Lois Tannehill

One of the best things about our group of writers is that we are all inspired by other members of the class. We have come to appreciate the fact that we have all become better writers simply by being in the presence of others who share our struggle. Thanks, Loie, for expressing this so well. ~ Bonnie

          I have met so many lovely people in my memoirs class. We all get along and enjoy each other’s company. The people and their stories are so diverse. They make the class so interesting. I look forward to class at 2:00 p.m. on Thursdays.

        I get inspiration from most of them to write my stories. They help me recall my life experiences. Some of their stories bring me to tears; others bring smiles. Bonnie, our teacher, gives us ideas that jar our memories. There are several in class that should publish their stories because they are so good. The stories the individuals write are heartfelt.

        I am writing my life story for my children and my children’s children. I’m glad that Yolanda invited me to join the class several years ago.

H is for . . .

During the month of September I have been blessed with two trips to the Central Coast -- one with my husband and one with a special friend from college days (oh so long ago!). Besides this unusual addition to my schedule, I have also purchased two (yes two) new computers this month. I'm not keeping them both. After a week or so of using the first one, I decided that although I loved the computer, it was just too big. Each computer purchase involves time transferring information from the old computer to the new one. All this extra activity has resulted in my neglect of various responsibilities, including this blog. I am sorry that you have had to wait so long for this next installment of alphabetical memories of our class.


Please read and enjoy the two "H" stories we have for this week -- and let the writers know you appreciate their work.


And, Lewis, if you happen to read this, we would all love to hear from you again!


Bonnie

H is for “Happy Healing”

By Lewis Hildreth

          This class has been a place for healing. All the stories, true or fiction, upbeat or sad, well said or not, have made this class interesting, enriching, and encouraging for me. I have been encouraged to say what at first I dare not say, to stand up and read my writings aloud, to give voice to what hasn’t been easy to say in the past.

        I know by my feelings that this class has been supportive and always encouraging. I always look forward to coming to class every Thursday. This class has been a place for wholeness to mend fragmented memories. The class has given encouraging feedback to help with creative isolation. The class overflows with supportive camaraderie to keep this writer cheerful in a dangerous world, gone insanely unconscious.

        I enjoy writing my assignments for every Thursday, trying to meet the deadline of the next class meeting. It takes effort to work through inertia, giving voice to my own ideas. The excitement of the creative process has brought a measure of healing happiness to me. If I never publish, it is immaterial to me, for writing my stories down and reading in class is so much fun and rewarding as I have said above. I feel healed both in heart and mind; that’s why I can say this class has been a place for healing.

H is for “Hiatus”

by Annette Skarin

 

My writing group has given me a much needed hiatus from life’s difficulties.

I had returned to California from Washington State a few years after my mother passed away, and after an unsuccessful operation to repair her heart. Two years after returning, and unsuccessfully trying to get a job, I was ready to give up. Life had been very difficult during most of my sixty years. I had never had a break from the relentless torment of the way my brain dysfunctioned. Finally, I began shaking my fist and yelling at God, “Why did you make me this way?” (He can take it, by the way). I came to a place in my journey of life where I was finally able to ask for help for a disorder that was beyond my control. God did hear my prayers, as He always has, and led me to the right help. I now feel more balanced and calmly joyful than I can ever remember.

I had been attending a large Bible study group consisting of women from many denominations and cultures. A lady from my group named Evelyn, continued to pester me about trying out a writing group she belonged to. I resisted at first because I didn’t believe I could write. I finally agreed to come along – just to get her off my back.

Well…here I am a couple of years later, and find that my strength to write about my struggles continues to be bolstered, and I continue to blossom into the writer I am today. I stumbled and stuttered and read too fast in the beginning. My class called, “Creative Writing/Memoir Writing” gave me the courage to continue in spite of my weaknesses.

Today, I’m a different person, as I continue to heal. I’ve taken off with my “writing wings” – into the flabbergasting future. I joined a Toastmasters group, called Cheerful Chatter, and learned how to speak with poise. I am now attending; the California Writers Club of Long Beach, once a month; and most importantly, I am using the gift God has given me, by exercising my writing muscle daily.

I hope this is not just a brief hiatus but a long one. Thank you, fellow writers, and teacher Bonnie – you’ve been a blessing to me.